One step at a time

One small step to reach out further, I did it today.

Not sure how it will turn out, but at least I see something else, another side of the blue sky instead of my own sky.

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Don't know what's wrong with me today, keep making mistakes.
I spilled a whole bowl of curry on my WHITE table and floor, not to mention table runner.
Took the whole night to clean it and now I have no time to watch House. DAMN.

Then I accidentally burn a shirt while ironing it, WHITE shirt.

Then I have to mop the floor again coz I smell curry all over.

Now I'm too tired to watch House. But to send some emails.


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Something is not right recently, smell something really funny.
Got to see some real faces and sucky personality today, and realize corporate world is never easy, never simple. I'm just lucky to witness them.

Hopefully everything turn out well. I do hope so.

Escape

Think positive girl.

As much as I want to, but I just don't have the energy anymore.
Even driving back home is a disaster, sitting in the living room thinking about the next day is dreadful.

Words turn into lah lah lah to me after some time. And my face can't hide, stoned and blacked.

I wonder how to reset this time.

Law of Attractions

Yay! Prayers heard, no Philippines this week, till next week~

Togetherness

So much have happened recently, I just choose to switch it off and reset.
I told my dear co-wokers, I have this ability to 'reset' feelings and things, I will feel normal after I do that.
But I think reset button have usage limitation. Somethings will just keep coming even after restart.

I'm flying off again next week, will be a darn tiring trip, the hours are crazy. But what am I to complain when I know great minds out there, they don't even sleep!

They enjoyed working 24/7, enjoyed invent something cool, and achieved something at the end of all the hardship. Success ain't easy, need to earn it.

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The past Thursday was mid autumn festival, it's my lunar birthday, my favorite chinese festival of the year!

There's so many memories about this day, my family used to celebrate my birthday on this day, it's more important than my actual day.

This year for some reason, I didn't manage to go back and celebrate. The feelings is kinda weird.
It's important but only you know it. My mom called and expected I'll have something on, but apparently I just enjoy the day off (MC actually) and just past the day.

I appreciate my childhood, for having families to celebrate special days with me. Sitting outside of the front yard in my Granny's house, sharing mooncake and pamelo, drinking chinese tea.

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I need to do something really therapeutic, something I can recover my tiredness of life. Something that worth for me to feel recharged for a week.

I missed the time I have friends who are close to you, concern about you and will grow with you. Togetherness ain't easy.

People can sit in one car but their mind are far apart. Sitting in the same table but keep looking at the phone screen. Working together but don't know each other life story.

I need a getaway badly, it's bad enough I just feel like stop doing whatever I'm doing, and do nothing.

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'Smart' people inspire me a lot. I started to make a move, at least to carve out something. It might be shapeless still, one day I will knowwhen the day has come.

Dear smart people, I hope we can still share stories and inspiration even when you are in a different universe.

Do nonsence lah

This is what I said, trying too hard. #domorelah, do WHAT? do MORE WHAT?
And what with that...erm...mascot?

Well done Malaysia.

Flowers

Feeling super happy with the flowers this week~ I don't know what this call but I've seen this many this in bridal bouquet.

Best RM8 invested so far~

Bless

Feel grateful that I have my shelter, my vehicle to bring me to work.
Feel grateful for the co-workers I met in work, they are beyond nice to me.
Thankful for any happiness I manage to laugh about, a good meal, good coffee, nice comfy bed, clear crisp water, sunny windy weather.

Grateful for supportive parents and friends, who support me in any form, with anything they can. My parents are awesome!

Thankful for the opportunities I have in different stage of life.
Thankful for many experience I had, who taught me lots of life lesson and how to deal with feelings.

Thank you.

Growing

Something in this world happen not by chance, not by arrangement, not by effort. Is by nature.
Just like how new born baby know how to cry, new born horse know how to gallop, fish can swim with no one teaching, we can breath with zero coaching.

Growing a plant is the same too.

We water the plant, leave it aside and the seed will turn into greens. That's simple.
You will not expect the seed to turn green, because there's nothing to expect. It's nature.
You can expect the plant to have red/ white/ blue flowers, or even fruits. But growing up into a plant is not within expectation. It's a process, is a cycle.

Some people existence is so natural, is like a breath of air.
You will never fear there's no air, there's always air.
Comfortable, essential and invisible.

I will learn to grow slow.
I finally realize the plant is not a fruit plant. It's a leaves plant.
Nothing to expect, just hoping the growing will continue.