Friday, June 18, 2010



Why must I surrounded by people like this always.
Being nice is something that I always want to do, I believe in giving in more, will get fruitful return.

However the reality proves me wrong, many. freaking. times.
My kindness been taken granted, and people only come to me when they have problem.
I goddam admit that sometimes I need attention, and insecure about my position, that's why I always want to be nice and kind to others.
No, I don't find this wrong, I'm doing the right thing and don't think that I'm taken people for granted.

I took everything upfront, give you all the support you need, all the time spent, end up I feel nothing, still empty and insecure.

What am I looking for?
I guess I'm just having low self esteem, just because I'm not as adorable as the others, not as feminine as the others, a bit more independent than others.
And there you go! Viola! I'm a guy/ girl.

Being myself doesn't give me any advantage. Not being myself gives my tough time.

I'm such a loser Libra. Can't decide what I want always. What I want for life? What I want to achieve at this point of time?

Such an attention freak I am.

Why do I have such feeling? Low self esteem sucks max.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

El Nino

This is the reason I update this post.


Tuesday, June 15, 2010


My life have been moving nowhere lately.

I always want to move forward, try something new, do something different.

But my life is getting nowhere lately. Repeating the routine I am, bitching the same thing, and continue.

I need a change perhaps. Very depressed today.

I'm a bitch who can't live without attention and companion.

I need a improvement, a freaking change.
Need to learn how to be more charismatic, more attractive, adorable, more like a girl i reckon.

I need to be loved!

Monday, June 14, 2010

Wish List

As title:

1) New handphone, can touch touch the screen one, can take awesome picture in silence.
2) Camera. I don't even have one now!!
3) New Hand bag. I know I have many already, but I still using the same one Shee Hoong gave me on my 21st birthday. I <3 the current one, but it is too big for office.
4) I need a new pillow case urghh.
5) Tint my car.
6) New jeans, color contact lens, hair cut.
7) A house. In K.L. Here.

OK, no more dreaming...get back to work.

Thankiu. Xie xie.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Liverpool Maniac

It's been a year now, away from our dream, our hardship in doing assignments, times we dig into the books in library, book hunting for the best book, borrow DVDs from library for movie marathon, night walk to Albert Dock, British breakfast cooking, dinner cooking after afternoon nap, Liverpool One window shopping, Eating out once in a while, Lobster Pot Lunch, carrying heavy groceries from Tesco, running to the 'Reduced price' section to look for cheaper food, happily waloop 1 pound strawberries and grapes,9 pence yogurt, 1.24 pounds Shandy, and BEERS!....

Looking back the old days, it still stay fresh in our memories, these memories are irreplaceable.

First time I cried so bad over my results is in Liverpool. The feeling of hatred over myself is indescribable. Without fail, I gotten a pretty bad result, that's the only thing I regretted in Liverpool. Other than this, many many first time experience in Liverpool. The first time I walk into a real cathedral, firs time speaking to ang moh, first time looking at LFC, first time

It's summer 2010 now, looking at the juniors pictures, their excitement and enthusiast are exactly the same as ours.
Their posing, the pictures, the scenery...everything are so familiar, except we are not in the picture itself.

The memories starts flooding in my mind after seeing the pictures in FB. I never been missing my hostel so much, I can even smells my room in my dream!

I miss Liverpool that much, I don't even know I can miss the place so so much.
Please send my regards to the place we spent so much time with.

H.E.L.L.O L.I.V.E.R.P.O.O.L!!!!!