Japan 2016

Konnichiwa!

This post serve as a travelogue to record my 29 birthday present to myself <3 p="">
I worked hard in year 2016. BLOODY HARD.
When I keep contemplating wherther I should go to Japan to reward myself, I reckon I should treat myself fairly given I worked my ass off in this year.

So I did, with my best travel mate, and off we go a magical journey.
It worth every penny we spend, and I think this is the BEST birthday present I ever gotten for myself.

The craziest thing we ever had in the entire trip. We went to a local bar with no idea what to order. This is served when we askfor their famous dish. RAW CHICKEN. It actually taste quite good :)

The normal karaage

Liver skewer

chicken meat ball

First night, bracing 5 degree to find food. I'm so glad we decided to come to this local bar. The boss is sooooo shy he trying to have small talk with us but he couldn't speak a word of English. End up we manage to engage with him using my very limited japanese

Ginkgo leaves everywhere!

Crazy japanese. They are protecting palm trees, coz basically palm trees can't stand the cold weather. They are wrapping the trees with straw to keep them 'warm', with certain design to beautify the wrapping. They even have a banner to explain why they doing this.

DREAM COME TRUE!

Arabica coffee! I've been following the instagram of this barista, and finally I can have a sip of dream.

Oversweet Taiyaki

Arashiyama. My favorite!

Leng! Single and still available!

This place is so unreal!

Some random flower shop. They don't keep the flowers inside at night, just leave it outside and NO ONE will steal the pots.

Every morning we stroll around and look for coffee. Family mart coffee wins

A small neighborhood in Kyoto called Hanazono. We started our journey crazy early every morning. We see students rushing to school, rows and rows of bicycle to work and to school. It's such an awesome experience.

Must have! Osaka shui gou gai!

Didn't had much sushi, only manage to eat ONCE :(

Kiyomizudera. Heard that they are going to close it for 3 years for refurbishing.

Kita no tenmangu. We paid 700 yen to enter the park but it's MAGICAL! The leaves are red untillllll.....

Mastuya! Still the best GYUDON!

We search around for this small cafe called KURASU. It's hidden at the alley near Kyoto Station. The barista speaks perfect english. Their signature is hand drip coffee. They basically make coffee while listening to John mayer, humming the music and dancing along. These make good coffee I guess, must be the John Mayer.

ICHIRAN!!!! HOU GIK DONG ARRR!

The original coco ichibanya. They changed their menu slightly, didn't taste as good as the first time I had it.

Who said you can't talk to deers?

This turn out to be the BEST ramen we ever had.

Yuzu flavor ramen. Awesome until I want to cry.

Christmas trees in Universal Osaka. Why trees also bigger than people wan.

Some random awesome fried pancake. Just because you're in Jurrasic park you need to eat this.

Magical Harry Potter town

Look what I'm saying? Magical until my skin also look damn purfect.

Pablo mini

Lobster roll

Suppose to be kobe beef but not as nice.

This is nice until wanna cry also. Okonomiyaki!

Why my skin complexion so nice wan.

This yakiniku is awesome untilI don't know what to say.

At Kaiyukan

Hearbreak warfare

Lightning strike
Inside, my chest to keep me up at night
Dream of ways
To make you understand my pain
--------------------------------------------------

I first heard this song at least 7 years ago, during lunch time, on one of the fella's car.
I asked, what song is this?
'Heartbreak Warfare'

It's not love on the first sight. This song didn't caught my attention until recently, around 2 years+ ago, this song stick to my head like a plaster.

Not sure why but somehow this song is replaying itself in my head again and again.
This song accompany through highs and lows, it's dark, gloomy, sad and emo. PERFECT.

-----------------------------------------------

If you want more love,
Why don't you say so?
If you want more love,
Why don't you say so?

-----------------------------------------------

Tonight I just want to reminiscing the feeling of this song. I will not listen to this song for a long long time. Let me chew this piece of memory like a stale chewing gum.

Running out of patience

Now that I grew older, one thing is running out in my bank other than money, is love and patience.
*just kidding*

Realizing I always do things for others but leave so little time for myself, I'm tired of people telling what to do.
'YOU SHOULD DO THIS, WHY DIDN'T YOU DO THAT, WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS?'

Well.

My patience is running low.
When I always prioritize other's issue over mine, and constantly telling myself, nvm, do this first, I will do mine later. The later never came.

And I fat mang zang because at the end I realize I can't tell what I have done to settle my own issue.

To name a few.

1. I been wanting to get a massage since, AUGUST. This year is counting down to 2017, and I still didn't do it. OH, did I mentioned I PAID for the massage which I never go?

2. I wanted to go for check up and took a jab for vaccine. But NEVER did.

The list goes on.

Why am I fat mang zang? Because if I make plan someone will fat mang zang at me.

I know what my problem is. Poor time management, yes. Always prioritize others than myself, yes.
And I always turn on NOS gas and turbo during work, and I leave NOTHING back for myself. At home my brain is usually stare blank or thinking about bad shit.

I'm also getting lazy in my private life.

I do nothing extra to maintain or elevate my lifestyle.
I stopped buying flowers for a while.
I wanted to use essence oil for the house, the old one ran out and i'm still not replacing it.
I stopped cooking breakfast since I have a dog.
I wake up later and later, that's why I don't have time for brekkie.
I stopped going to the mall, compare to last time I need to go to the mall at least once a week.
I wanted to practice guitar, but it's demotivating.

I want to be a better version next year. Time for an upgrade!

Normalize

I'm usually blog with a title in my head, but today I nothing in my head so just f it... title is lame as shit.

Well, we finally had the trip we always wanted. A trip planned over beer, attendees agreed volunteered and half forcing, but it happened!

I've looked forward to it before my Japan trip.. ohya Japan, gonna write about it later.
2 days after my Osaka trip here I off to another retreat with my favorite people!

I guess compare with other friends we spend relatively more time with each other, at least we will meet 1 month once I guess?
All of them worked under one roof except me. I'm so grateful that I'm included into that friends circle.

It should be a talking, bullshitting, playing laughing trip. I thought there will be guitar there but there isn't, so jukebox from phone it is!

Now I'm back to reality, can't tell exactly what kind of feeling I carry back with me. It's mixed feelings.

At some point I felt warm, looking at those limited pictures we took, and glad it happened.
I felt happy too with so much laughter of crazy drunkard and bitches talk.
I felt one kind probably I had a random fight out of some random reason I don't even think is worth to talk about it.

But I guess I just kept my annoyance in here and in my brain, so little provoke is enough to make me blast.

 

But honestly, ever since the cat is out of the bag I felt so much brighter after connecting the dots.
I guess being left half hanging and too much guessing is not healthy.

What if you REALLY refuse to hang out anymore because of your important another half? I get it!
Do I look like a dumb bitch who can't understand priorities?

I accept the fact that things changed, so don't say nothing changed. Everything changed, you just fail to see it.

Everything aside, I feel really lifted when I know you're happy. I guess that's what friends are for, regardless how much toxic I kept inside but I'm still in the same team!

 I spend a 10-15 min talking to another joker about some shit I had recently, although I'm f-ing sure you won't remember when you awake but I do feel better. kamxia.

I guess there's really too much emotions to digest yesterday, I can't even get a few hours of good sleep.

I hope I can forget that face really fast, not many people yelled at me in my 29 years life. And I'm usually very forgiving and forgetful.

But those who did, unfortunately I remembered.

-----------------

I really wished I was drunk too. So I don't need to feel shitty after the shit.

-----------------

I'm an adaptive person. I just need time to adjust, but usually I get to adjust after some time.
Another month to go and I'm 30!


I promised myself to live my last 20s the best way I can, before I realize it's already December!

I keep mumbling =..=

End of my favorite, Bye October

Most of our fav month is always birthday month.
Mine too.

October has been great, don't be fooled by the picture. This is irrelevant to Oct.
I got so much love, so much birthday greetings, so many present I unexpected, so many celebrations I can't even be thankful enough.

October has been great, although, I missed my target, AGAIN.

-----------

Why hater.
I believe the toughest part of my job is to face hater.

I tried my best to be the nicest person you know, your friend, your advisor when you don't have clue, your helper and your trusted one.

But always, there's hater within internal and external. And the part I hate the most is to keep going back to them like an ex girlfriend, hoping for forgiveness and love.

Hoping them will love me back.

That's life right?

Despite how much I do or how little I do, haters gonna hate.

------------

Hello friend, who hurts me.

I will not blame you for being distance and cold, it's a choice of life.
I choose to love you more and hopefully, you will open your heart and we be that idiot friend who talks crap and sometime intelligent talks again.


-------------

I'm grateful for those who love me, and I will love you back unconditionally.
It's blessed to feel the love, and to know that some where, these people will not leave you behind, they stand by you. They save you when you need them. They will not say no if I need help.

It feels warm actually.

Thank you god, for what I have, what I will have and what I never had.

I'm Blessed :)

People saw me at the lift and asked : HOW MANY ROUNDS OF BIRTHDAY CELEBRATIONS DID YOU HAD?

#WELL

I'm loved!

This year I had the most celebration, the most flowers, the most hugs and the most kisses I received.

For that, I thank you alll of you who love me and treat me like a lil princess on my small humble birthday.

I heart u all!

Gonna have a fantastic year ahead!

29 years old!!

I'm officially 29!
Yay!

It's 12.22am now, just past my official day of turning into 29.
I must said this year is very eventful.

I have lots of ups, in career, with friends, with another half, with family.
There's lots of downs as well, I guess things need to balance up a bit. Stressed with career, fuss about friends and etc.

But I thankful for such arrangement in life. I learnt a lot, learn to be strong, and learn that I'm invincible, I can do anything I want, at least I believe so.

I see myself clearer, 29 years old me.
I like to be myself once in a while, please myself, be alone and feel secure about it.

I had massive insecurity few months ago, and to my friend who are super annoyed at my famous quote, #quarterlifecrisis.
I fear for the unknown, fear for the future, and worst is I had so much regrets which I hope to do better, but I can't turn back time. So much worry it drowns me.

I'm better now, like I said, I learnt.
I will control the future, and live every bit of it. And I feel much secure now.

It's my last 20s, and I like to experience everything! I am excited with the unknown, go for it!

To everyone whom I love, loved and loving me, thank you for the warm wishes on my small little birthday. I felt big with all your love.

Thank you.