All over the place

Everything is driving me INSANE. Literally.

I just sit here, looking around, listening around, birds chirping, loud noise here and there.

There's too many disruption, I don't know how to pick myself up. I don't know how to flame myself up. I don't know what is in front of me.

Can I just laugh out loud and just leave everything behind?
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Hopefully after this I can find back the restart button.

Keep going and be strong

These days it suddenly reminds myself that I should be strong, and keep going strong. I believe in girl power, and believe there's nothing in the world girl can't do.

However after some complications, I learned to tone myself down. Be vulnerable when it's necessary, be weak and dumb when it needed to, be empty when it's to your benefits.

I can't say I'm right, but I think this does tone me down and be less 'fierce'.

But this is a self reminder, I must always improve myself.

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Life is boring like a still water.
Job is unknown, and now we are playing waiting game, last man standing wins.
I'm not always the last man standing, maybe I should try once.
I'm very anxious in nature, I can't wait and I can't waste time. But this time I'm taking a huge bet, since fate bring me such a way, I shall wait and see.

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There's always different passerby and different interesting people in my life in different stage.
I'm thankful for knowing all these people, and get to know how unique and interesting every individual are. They make me understand myself, overcome my weakness and know other people better.

Those who stayed longer make me understand you better, those who touch n go I'm still thankful for knowing you. I believe all of the passerby are nice and kind person. Blessed.

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I just discovered Instagram recently, need some outing to fill up my life...

And believe it or not my selfie skill dropped tremendously. I need pretty pictures !!!!!!!

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ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCK: I went for hiking with a bunch of nice people. HIKING omg..the thing I hate on my top 10 list, but I think I don't particular hate it now. Yay achievement unlock!

All the best thing in the world

It's just too hard to get everything in the world.
It's weird that how messy my filing system is, and still people are saying I'm organized.
Trying to claim back my tax repayment balance for the longest time, but still there's missing payslip here and there.

I'm so hate myself for not keeping a proper filing.

Now that my old files are gone, it's almost impossible for me to recover the old files :(

BOO HOO.

And thinking about getting EA form from the previous employer...worries me.

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On a bright side, I got a surprise present today!
It's a watch!

I always love watch as a gift, that's why I asked for one on my 21st birthday.

Watch represent time, time is the only unit of measurement in the world. Without time, we are nothing. Time proves the moment, moment creates memories.
Time that forms into memories are timeless. That's why I love watch as gift.

Thanks so much. Long live friendship!

Recent updates: Phuket Getaway

Went for a short company getaway while we're under secondment. It's super awesome because it's in Marriott! Who can say no to Marriott!

It's relaxing, fun and full with hot bods all the time.

It's been a long while since I truly unwind and have fun. I guess eventually not all things are negative. After the recharged everything seems a bit better.

I guess life is a waiting game. You never know the better opportunity might appear right in front of you if you wait long enough.

Square one

I never been feeling so stuck before.

It's like when you're listening to song, and your pc is performing blue screen, and the song in fraction keep repeating.

It's annoying isn't it?

I am this stuck. Moving no where, fading away from the old friends.

One failed interview experience ruin everything. Probably the most annoying experience I had so far.
So to cut the story short, I went to an interview which sounds super 150% promising, went through the second round, did a full round office introduction, talked about job scope and details. They asked me not to confirm with anyone. They want me.

AND NOTHING HAPPEN AFTER THAT.

You can call this insult, embarrassment, no reply, drop off, or I'm ego too big.
I am actually.

I'm defeated by this 'silent reply', and you can't imagine how much it hit me.
Not a big tight slap, it's slowly sink in, slowly but killing.

Am I that bad, and I don't deserve a proper reply?

But good thing about it, is that now I know they don't value people, don't value me. It could be a good thing happen to me.

Moving forward, look up and march. Stop thinking negative and hopefully my stucked mind will flush out like toilet bowl.

Time-less

And so, time is ticking.
Time was never an issue for us, when we are still so young, and we thought we will be forever young.

This whole year I've been indulging myself in stubborn decision and wrong move. And there goes my 27 years old. A year I so eager to fly, and yet I'm quiet like a still water.

Just visited a friends' blog few min ago, and I feel only love in between her lines. No cover up, no fancy words, it's just like highschool girl deeply in love. Dare to admit, dare to say LOVE.
It's just so simple.

It's nothing wrong to love madly, or love normally.
I'm definitely took too much time to figured a way to work well with each other. We rely each other on different thing, and I think we manage to find a balance in between. And among those are a lot of patience, adaptation and getting to know all over again.

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Been quiet lately, and I'm going to have Raya break start form tomorrow.
I can easily think nothing and be like a melon at home tomorrow.

When it's all good

Been abandon here for quite some times, here's the drama recently...

1. The BF was admitted to hospital

It happened one day before his first day of work, had severe abdomen pain.
At first we thought it's just normal stomachache, turn out to be much serious pain after few days of observation.

The stomach is bloated like delivering baby, and it never gone better. No food or water for 4 days, then doctor decided to operate on him. Doctor removed a 1 feet long sausage from his intestine, and appear to be extra intestine since born.

Total fasting of 9 days straight, now slowly recovering with soft solid food. Good improvement and good weight lost.


2. Days in the Better side

Just training...training and more training.
And the fact that not all product is compatible with each other, the training can only take one at a time. Many of the products are conflicting in each others' interest.

Life is quite...peaceful and free...
Which I can only enjoy for a few days. After that is boring and panic.

Panic for stuck in here. And many struggle in ideology, policies and the way it works.
I tried to imagine thousand times, how to mold myself here, but there's so many argument within myself I can't persuade the innerself.
How.


3. Look forward

Something to look forward to on the bright side.
I have 2 trips coming up, Oct to Taiwan with the girls, and Nov with the poor bf.
Hopefully he's all well by that time and can eat whatever he wants.